In many societies, certain stigmatisation follows the challenge of infertility. In parts of Africa especially, infertility is regarded as a shameful problem to have. Childbearing is highly valued in most Nigerian communities, and childlessness has manifold social consequences. For this reason, couples (women more than men) resort to searching quietly for cures, solutions, and remedies to the problem.
In Nigeria, the true meaning of marriage is only fulfilled if the couple conceives and bears children. Children are considered to be a source of power and pride.
While some attempt solutions like IVF, others try adoption, which hasn’t been quite as well-received in Nigeria as in countries of the West. For the unscrupulous ones though, baby-buying is the easiest way to achieve parenthood status, without questions.
IVF for many families is considered too expensive as it sometimes ranges between N500,000 and N1million and has about a 50 percent chance of failure. Many couples find these odds, not to their liking.
Adoption, on the other hand, comes with challenges of its own. There is the age of the child to be considered and how family and friends would treat an adopted child. The stigma that sometimes follows adoption is perhaps the biggest reason adoption is not a popular choice. This is coupled with the fact that in many Nigerian homes, relation by DNA, the opportunity to pass on family genetics, remains the most widely accepted.
After one year of regular intercourse, approximately 84 percent of couples will have conceived naturally, a study reveals. The study further states that the chances of conception rise to 92 percent after two years and to 93 percent after three years. After three years of not conceiving, the likelihood of a couple achieving pregnancy in the following year falls to 25 percent or less. The study further stipulates that about one in 10 couples can have difficulty conceiving.
Infertility has many potential causes, which may involve the man, the woman or both partners. In some cases, no cause of the problem can be determined, in which case the infertility is described as ‘unexplained’.
Unfortunately, couples that go through infertility remain in crisis if no solution is available. It represents a major crisis for most couples, with both partners experiencing loss of self-worth and self-esteem.
Childless couples can perceive well-meant remarks made at social gatherings or birthday parties, for example, as negative. Many women from countries like Nigeria consider their lives as hopeless if they cannot conceive because they face discrimination, ostracism and stigma if they fail to become pregnant or carry a baby to term.
Mrs. Lemi Bernard is a 52 year-old mother of two who resides in one of the border communities between Ogun and Lagos States. She explained to Saturday INDEPENDENT that she luckily became a mother as a result of her quick thinking and her ability to procure the funds to get a baby. With this, she is able to avoid the weird glances that women get when they fail to have children of their own.
Sharing her story in her native parlance, she said, “I got pregnant in Secondary School while I was schooling in Ilorin. My parents were very angry. I even thought my father would kill me. He actually would have killed me if not for my mother who helped me abort the baby in our house. The pregnancy was almost five or six months before they saw it, so it was hard.”
Bernard continued saying, “By the time I finished Secondary School, I knew I did not want to further my education, so I went to do business in Ibadan. Eventually, I got married, but baby never came. My husband was patient with me initially, but after five years, he started to go out and not come back. Eventually, after nine years, the marriage crashed.
“After waiting for another four years and trying with different men, I knew that I was the one who had a problem, so when I got married again, a friend’s sister took me to someone that could help me. Now I have two good children and I am happy. Nobody can say I am barren. Even my husband is happy and content. All it cost me was money.”
While Bernard was reluctant to share the deeper secrets of her baby-buying journey, she did say that, “when you have money, there is nothing you cannot buy. Today, we are no longer wealthy. In fact, the older of my two children, who is already in JSS 2 attends a public school because of money, but I don’t regret how I got the children.”
While her story might appear shocking, Saturday INDEPENDENT got another shocker. She shared the story of her friend whose sister helped her. After identifying the other woman simply as Mama Yellow, she spilled her secrets.
“Mama Yellow is very rich, but she and her husband have not had children since. She even lied to her husband that she gave birth in her last marriage but her sister told me it is a lie, that her sister has never been pregnant, let alone give birth. Mama Yellow bought her children from a place in Port Harcourt, but at that time, we didn’t know it was called baby factory. Whenever Mama Yellow wants a baby, she will go there. They will look at her and look for a girl that looks a little like her. Then they will find a man that has the same skin tone as the person that wants the baby so that the child won’t look too different from the ‘mother’.
“When that is settled, you pay for upkeep and medication and they start. Once the girl is pregnant, they call you and give you drugs to take that will make it look like you are also pregnant. Your body will start to change once you start taking the drugs; you will be tired and sleepy too, so everyone around you will think you are pregnant.
“Once it is a few weeks or months to the due date, depending on how buoyant you are, they will call you to travel down so that you will be near the pregnant girl. Immediately the girl delivers, they take the baby from her. They don’t even let the girl hold the baby so that she won’t get used to the baby. They give you the baby and you have become a mother.
“Mama Yellow did it three times. Fortunately for her, when she went back the third time five years ago, the girl that was carrying her baby was pregnant with twins, so she paid extra. She even sold one of her houses in the Eastern part of Nigeria to pay for the twins.
“Unfortunately, even though her husband did it with her willingly, he later impregnated another girl and bought her a house where she stays now. When it became a problem, he insisted that he did it because he must have his own biological children.”
While Bernard refused to reveal the actual amount that changed hands, she said, “Around 2006, they used to say it was about N400,000 to N500,000. But now, if you don’t have at least one million or two million naira, you can’t get a good one.”
These stories, while heartbreaking remains quite mild. One of the more recent child acquisition stories Saturday INDEPENDENT could find was the story of a woman in Iju area of Lagos. According to her husband of 29 years, his wife has always had miscarriages.
“She has had more than 15 miscarriages during our 29 years of marriage. Each time we think she will carry the pregnancy to term, something happens and she loses the pregnancy, even at six months. I thought we were cursed. One time she even gave birth and it was a stillbirth. We lost hope, and I married another woman. Within one year, my young wife gave birth to a baby girl, and we thought, my first wife would give birth, according to what we believe in the Yoruba culture. But after three years, she didn’t conceive, let alone give birth. Instead, her junior got pregnant again and gave birth to my son. That was how I knew she had problem, so I didn’t spend too much time with her.
“Once in a while, I spend the night with her, but I gave up on getting a child from her. Two years ago, 2017 during the December 31st crossover service, she told me that she was pregnant. I was surprised because she had not had any pregnancy or miscarriage in almost 17 years, but I took it with a pinch of salt. I didn’t expect it to stay.
“Later, she told me she was travelling to stay with her sister in Abuja, that Lagos stress was not good for the baby, so I said okay. A few months later, they called me that she gave birth and I was shocked. I didn’t believe it. I flew to Abuja immediately and I met her in a small clinic with a newborn baby girl. I was really happy that God had finally answered her after 25 years.
“I began to suspect foul play when she returned to Lagos and I never saw her breastfeed the baby. She said her doctor placed her on some drugs and it would be harmful to the baby. She always kept the baby locked in her apartment, and instead of getting a nanny, she brought a small girl from her village to assist her. Everything was fishy, but I never thought there was any problem.
“The girl is two years old now and we had moved on. My first daughter is in the university now, so the house is generally empty, so sound travels between all the apartments. I heard her on the phone talking to someone that ‘why is it so expensive?’ I heard her say she doesn’t if it’s another girl or boy, so the price shouldn’t differ. After I confronted her, she confessed that she went to Rivers State to get the baby, that she was tired of people looking at her like a barren woman. I had no choice but to forgive her, but that child is not mine and will never be. It is just like adoption, the child can never be yours.”
A concerned Nigerian who gave his name as Charles Davies said, “I don’t understand why everyone is making a big deal about these baby factories. It is simply business. It is a transaction. So far the girls are willing and they are paid, it is the same with adoption. Our problem is that we focus on the wrong things in Nigeria.”
But the Director-General of the National Agency for the Prohibition of Trafficking in Persons (NAPTIP), Dame Julie Okah Donli has a different opinion on things.
Speaking exclusively to Saturday INDEPENDENT, she said, “I think those who buy babies are just criminals because there is a procedure. There are legal ways by which anyone can adopt a child. First, you can’t just go and adopt a child like that, you must bond with that child for at least six months, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Why are you in a hurry to go and get a baby, a baby that you do not know and are not used to if you don’t have sinister motives? There are legal ways of adopting, and I expect and advice people to go through legal means because it is not an excuse. Buying a baby is a criminal offense and anybody that is caught buying a baby will be prosecuted. There are legal ways of adopting children in Nigeria and I advise everyone to stick to that.”
On the recent discovery of baby factories in Lagos, Donli said, “Seven of the girls from the baby factories would be having their babies any minute from now, they are in NAPTIP shelter. Out of the 26 girls that were given to us, 22 are pregnant between four months to eight months. Right now, we are taking care of them, we are feeding them and they are going to have their antenatal care and all of that. We just have to take it a day at a time. After their babies are born, then we would know the next steps to take, but right now, we are just interested in making sure that they are healthy and they have their babies safely while we go after the traffickers.”
She also shared that the kingpin of the baby factory operations is still on the run. “Madam Oluchi Eze is on the run. She is the kingpin. Her two accomplices are in custody, so we are still looking for Madam Oluchi Eze.”
